My Other Half

stared out the window of the M7 bus hoping that the ride would not take as long as it had for the past week I had been traveling to downtown Manhattan. I was disconnected to the world but I was connected to Lupe Fiasco and how he was a “Superstar”. To think I had to make this trip back home during rush hour after working, I was not looking forward to that. I looked at the Betsey Johnson store window but didn’t really see any thing. I felt drowsy, like I hadn’t slept in over two days. My eyes were heavy and wouldn’t stay open. I knew it was due to boredom but I could not even manage to concentrate long enough on the book I started the month earlier and the music in my Ipod acted as a lullaby at the volume I had it on. Just as I dropped my head to my bent elbow resting on the lip of the window, my cell phone rang. My phone was so loud it startled me and the person who sat next to me. I jumped and fumbled through my purse to get it out. “Hello? Hello?” I said, disoriented and still shocked of the volume of my phone. “Hi Tashi!” a small voice said on the other line. It was my sister, I hadn’t spoken to her since the night before and she had left this morning without saying good bye. “Hi Lee how are you? I miss you.” I said, excited to hear from her. “I miss you too, I’m good just wanted to see how you were doing because I know that you are on your way to work, right?” she was right. This summer was the first summer me and my sister were working separately. “Yeah I’m almost there, so I guess you can’t talk much now right? You have to get back to work?” I asked. “Yup,” she said “just wanted
to make sure my baby was ok.” We said our goodbyes and hung up after only about two minutes talking.
When I was born on May 23, 1991, there was someone waiting for me, someone who would be with me forever and someone who would understand me no matter what. I didn’t understand it then or even as I got older, but I was blessed with a life partner. A partner who would play dolls with me, help me with Trigonometry homework and show me an example of a truly mature and upstanding personality. I can honesty say I don’t know what its like to be lonely or go to sleep with something on my mind and not be able to unload it.
When I was in elementary school my sister and I would do everything together. We would go to school together, hang out together, and went no where without the other. I guess I didn’t see anything wrong with that. We had a very small family and were always told that we had to “stick together”. I liked being with my sister all the time. I saw other twins and they seemed to be the same way with each other. Eating lunch with one another and playing tag in the playground. I could not picture being away from my sister.
No one seemed to know our real names. To outsiders, our name was “twin”. Although our names obviously were not “twin”, we answered to it and were not really bothered by it. It felt like a nickname to us.
In high school we began slowly individualizing ourselves, having different friends and being away from each other a little more. In the summer leading up to eleventh grade we worked together at a youth center. We were in the same room everyday, doing the same thing and hanging out with the same people, just like when we were in elementary and middle school. And as the next summer approached we decided that we wanted to do separate things. I was a
little hesitant about this idea but eventually saw an opportunity to see life alone. My sister applied and got accepted into a District Attorneys internship and I was accepted to write for a teen magazine.
The first day of my internship my sister rode the bus with me and left me there. I watched her walk out of the office, abandoning me like I was a useless puppy. I wanted so badly to run after her and pull on her leg. For seventeen years she was the second part of me, we were like shoes: can’t buy just the left one, have to buy the entire package. I felt like I was missing one of my shoes. After she left I sat in the small stuffy room observing the other six interns. I couldn’t see anyone I would ever be even remotely interested in getting to know. I was not going to betray my sister by giving these people a chance to know me, I was being stupidly stubborn.
For almost two weeks I spoke to no one extensively and rode back and forth to work bummed and lonely. When my sister started her internship, she seemed to really like it. She made friends with her co-workers and energetically recounted her day to me. I wanted to share with her my experiences as well, to be excited about what I was doing like the day I got accepted to the internship. I made a conscience decision to try and make some friends and let my co-workers get to know me without my sister, something no one had ever done before.
The next week I went in with an entirely new attitude. I greeted everyone and got there early to talk to whoever came early. I made two friends quickly and from then on I ate lunch with them and engaged in conversations I had never had with anyone before. I really enjoyed myself. I went home everyday with stories to tell my sister and looked forward to the days ahead.

I began feeling confident in myself and didn’t think I needed my sister in order to win people over. I found out that I was an individual with my own ideas and opinions and I was not betraying my sister by enjoying myself.
Being a twin has changed my life. It has taught me that I have a lifelong friend that although we look alike, we are different people who will offer the world different perspectives and make different impacts. On May 23, 1991 I was born twenty minutes after my best friend, my twin sister, and although we are individuals following separate paths we will always an unmistakable bond that no one will ever understand.